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I took a long sip of my wine and leaned back in the chair. My mind was going a million miles a minute. Then I met with two former skinheads, to develop a vocabulary of hate for my White Supremacist character. Years ago, Tim beat up and left a gay man for dead. After getting datinv of the Movement, he started to work at the Simon Weisenthal Center talking about hate crimes and realized one day that the man he had left for dead worked there too. There datinb apologies and forgiveness, and now, they are friends who talk about their unique experience to groups every week.

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Nowadays, White Supremacists dress like ordinary folks. When it came time to title this book, I found myself struggling again. Many of you who are long-time fans of mine know this was not the original name of the novel. Martin Luther King, Jr.: However, I also knew that both Ruth and Kennedy have moments in this novel where they do a small thing that has great and lasting mcmillaan for others. Plus, for many whites who are just beginning to travel the path of racial self-awareness, Dr. His eloquence about a subject most of us feel inadequate putting into words is inspiring and humbling.

Moreover, although individual changes cannot completely eradicate racism -- there are systems and institutions that need to be overhauled as well — it is through small acts that racism is both perpetuated and partially dismantled. For all of these reasons — and because I hope it will encourage people to learn more about Dr. King -- I chose this title. Of all my novels, this book will stand out for me because of the sea change it inspired in the way I think about myself, and because it made me aware of the distance I have yet to go when it comes to racial awareness.

In America, we like to think that the reason we have had success is because we worked hard or we were smart. A social justice educator named Peggy McIntosh has pointed out some of these advantages: Walking into a random hair salon and finding someone who can cut your hair. Getting a promotion without someone suspecting that it was due to your skin color. Asking to speak to someone in charge, and being directed to someone of your race. Some said occasionally; some admitted they never discussed it. When I asked the same question of Black mothers, they all said, Every day.

So what have I learned that is helpful? Instead, recognize that differences between people make it harder for some to cross a finish line, and create fair paths to success for everyone that accommodates those differences. If your friend makes a racist joke, call him out on it, instead of just going along with it. If the two former skinheads I met can have such a complete change of heart, I feel confident that ordinary people can, too. I expect pushback from this book. I will have white people challenging me for calling them out on their racism. I wrote it because I believed it was the right thing to do, and because the things that make us most uncomfortable are the things that teach us what we all need to know.

There is a fire raging and we have two choices: Yes, talking about racism is hard to do, and yes, we stumble over the words—but we who are white need to have this discussion amongst ourselves. Because then, even more of us will overhear and then, I hope, the conversation will spread. I am not a social justice educator, so I can offer advice only as someone who is still a work in progress. The first thing I can tell you is what NOT to do: That ignores the impact racism has had on others. If so, what would you like me to do? For this reason, Black Lives Matter. Know the difference between equal and equitable.

If you had a blind student in your classroom would you give her a written test? Likewise it is important to realize that because people of color may be at a disadvantage be in in health care, jobs, education it is necessary to level the playing field, to make success fair and possible for all. Do you know who Henry Ossian Flipper is? Put yourself into a position where you are not the majority in the room.